Reading Aloud, A Gift of Love

Like many others at this time, my friend Jeanette’s daughter E. is working from home. With two young children, and her husband away during the day, she is finding it difficult. Earlier this week, while they were speaking on the phone, E. asked her mother to read aloud to her son, a five-year-old who loves books. 

During her visits every six weeks to see her daughter and family, Jeanette had been reading Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George. Now she continued reading the story over the phone. (Internet connections from the island where Jeanette lives were not reliable enough for her to use Skype.) 

Amazingly, her grandson remained attentive for an hour, listening to his grandmother’s voice as they followed the story of Julie, a young Inuk girl growing up in Alaska. His Lego pieces were on hand, in case he wanted to build something as he listened, but he didn’t. He was content to be still, connecting to the story and his grandma through the remarkable medium of the human voice.

What favourite story would you choose to read aloud to a child in your life or a friend who lives far away? What story would you ask another to read to you?

When my brother and his family were living in Zambia, I recorded my father reading aloud a picture book by Don Freeman called Inspector Peckit. The story tells of a bungling pigeon detective combing the streets of Paris for a lost handbag. The cassette of my father reading the story arrived in Zambia and proved to be a wonderful way of connecting my dad with his  faraway grandchildren.

There is no doubt that stories are a powerful medium for connection. When story-sharing happens in real time, and when the voice of a loved one is the medium through which we hear the story there is added depth and resonance. The one we love is giving us this gift of story.

In a workshop I gave recently at the BC Mindfulness Summit, titled “The Listening Heart: Mindfulness and Storytelling,” I suggested that both reading and telling stories presents a remarkable opportunity to share in the discovery of mindfulness or mindful awareness. This practice is an invaluable skill in times of rapid change and unpredictability. Through a daily training in mindfulness, we learn how to open to this moment of uncertainty. Bringing attention to whatever is unfolding, with an attitude of genuine interest and care, we empower ourselves to make wise decisions about what needs doing and how we can best care for ourselves and those around us. Mindfulness allows us to act from a place of compassion rather than out of fear or anxiety.

In times such as these, with the clear direction to maintain social distance, it is tremendously important to stay connected to friends and family and to remember our rituals of connection. Story-sharing is one such ritual.

Six Ideas for A Story-Sharing Ritual

1. Arrive. Find a creative way of signalling that this is a sacred time, a precious opportunity to connect through story. Choose a cozy space in one corner of your home. Arrange the pillows, and settle in. Light a candle perhaps, or play a few notes on an instrument to welcome the story-listening energy to join you.
2. Protect the time and space from interruption. 
3. Choose the book you want to read, or select a favourite story to retell from memory.
4. Before beginning, arrive more fully and more deeply. Sit quietly for a few moments, noticing what’s happening within and around you. Share an observation about your sensory experience of the moment: a sound, a smell, a texture, a feeling of warmth or coolness. Share an observation about your interior landscape. 
5. As you read or tell the story, see if you can pause at intervals to discover the characters' sensory experience. Together imagine what they might be hearing, smelling, feeling, or seeing.
6. Savour the deliciousness of sharing a story with another living being. Allow some quiet moments of reflection when the story has come to an end.  One or two questions might open the way to an even deeper experience of the narrative. “Did the story make you think of anything?” “Who do you think might enjoy hearing that story?” “How do you feel right now?”

Story-sharing is a gift of love, whether we are reading aloud or telling a personal experience. Christina Baldwin sums it up beautifully in her book, Storycatching: Making Sense of Our Lives Through the Power and Practice of Story:

“As creatures of story, we long for story: not just wordiness but the quality of interaction story engages in us. As we practice the art of story catching, we can look for opportunities to insert story space into our daily lives. Story shifts us into connection…”